Not sure if that's a thing now.
The proper term is "asocial." When my cousins are on their phones during dinner the whole time, my aunt says they are being "anti social" (or non-socializing).
In any case, its hermit mode for me on and offline. I have no energy to talk to people on a Facebook. No energy to comment. Probably a like or react. Same situation offline.
Maybe I like the passiveness of my tiny blog in the corner of the web, writing down everything, unfiltered to a degree. Whereas a Facebook status update, a tweet, or a comment on everything social media + forums often elicit instant replies, likes/reacts, share/retweets, almost like face-to-face interactions which warrant a follow up response.
Ironically, this was the case for blogging. But technology has caught up and, with a smartphone readily available, you can update on the fly.
Maybe I just need to detox. Probably not the proper term.
I'm done.
Showing posts with label musing. Show all posts
Showing posts with label musing. Show all posts
Monday, July 10, 2017
Sunday, May 4, 2014
Picking Up Painting Again
The last time I did some serious art work was in high school. Prior to that in elementary school, I learned the basics of light and dark shading, blending palettes, darker/lighter colors in background/foreground, and water and oil painting from my father's painter friend. Haven't had much time to dive into it. I make digital edits and comic strips from time to time, but I always wanted to get back into painting.
I bought a few small-frame canvasses, a painting palette, a small supply of oil-based paint tubes, small and large brushes and a tiny easel. That was in 2012 (Or maybe late 2011). It collected dust in the basement until last night.
With no object in mind, I just started mixing a small slab of dark blue and titanium white in coconut oil and applied it all over the canvas with a large brush. It came out with a sky blue shade. Using a small brush, I used orange and enveloped the canvas. Since this is oil painting, it takes a long time for the paint to dry. The orange mixed in with the blue already on the canvas in a dark rusty shade. I didn't know what I was going for, but it looked like the dark shade of fire flames. I tried adding yellow, but the orange was just too strong. Not much I can do. I left it to dry. Not the same as the apples and oranges and trees/buildings we used as subjects, but this will do for now.
A few things I (re)-learned:
I'm done.
I bought a few small-frame canvasses, a painting palette, a small supply of oil-based paint tubes, small and large brushes and a tiny easel. That was in 2012 (Or maybe late 2011). It collected dust in the basement until last night.
With no object in mind, I just started mixing a small slab of dark blue and titanium white in coconut oil and applied it all over the canvas with a large brush. It came out with a sky blue shade. Using a small brush, I used orange and enveloped the canvas. Since this is oil painting, it takes a long time for the paint to dry. The orange mixed in with the blue already on the canvas in a dark rusty shade. I didn't know what I was going for, but it looked like the dark shade of fire flames. I tried adding yellow, but the orange was just too strong. Not much I can do. I left it to dry. Not the same as the apples and oranges and trees/buildings we used as subjects, but this will do for now.
A few things I (re)-learned:
- Oil painting is messy - Besides the paint taking longer to dry, cleaning your brushes is the worst.
- Brushes are overrated - I've forgotten how annoying brush bristles are, falling out of the brush and on the canvas.
- I prefer water painting (sort of) - I had this discussion with my sibling about a year ago with me getting back into oil painting. She said she preferred water painting because it dries quickly. The thing about oil painting is that you can mix in the color really well and don't have to worry much about it drying quickly. If you're doing multi-layered paint job, you'd have to wait for a day or two.
- Cleaning up sucks - not much else to say.
- Turpentine/Paint remover creates a sticky substance with Lysol - that was unexpected and made clean up harder.
I'm done.
Monday, March 3, 2014
A College Dilemma in the Past
I wrote this prior to graduating high school 11 years ago:
It's always hard to make a decision especially when it greatly influences your life. To some, this may seem easy to decide, but not to me. Deciding whether to live on campus or stay at home is the biggest problem right now in my life. I keep thinking of reasons to live in campus or stay at home. I keep comparing and contrasting ways how each are advantageous. This is twisting me inside. It would be great if I have advisers like the President right now. Either way, I'm still going to college. That's probably the only good thing about this, but should I stay or go?
It's hard for me to narrow down to the simplest reasons for both. If I go, I can learn to live by myself. Still, that does not guarantee me safe passage to adulthood. If I stay, it is less money to pay with tuition and dorm, but still under my parents' roof. I guess it all boils down to one thing: RULES.
With my parents, I've been told to do chores, help out, obey orders... those rules. These have turned me into the person that I am now. Without these rules I'm not me. I won't be me. I've noticed these changes ever since my parents stopped telling me to sleep at nine o'clock or telling me what to do. They still tell me occasionally to sleep early and what to do, but they don't care as much as they tell my younger sister to do them. Ever since they've mellowed down with the rules, I have more freedom. I don't remember as much, but I probably felt quite happy and excited to be able to do more things than I could have even done before. Now, I realize this much freedom is scaring me. Freedom without rules is chaos. It will regress me as a person to something else. Living in campus gives me the ultimate freedom of being by myself. I don't think I can handle that much freedom. That is why I have decided to stay home while in college.
Looking back, it wasn't really a dilemma. I was still waiting acceptance letters from the colleges I applied to. All schools were within driving distance. That said, the furthest I've driven at the time was to our local mall. If I did housing in college, I wouldn't have to worry about traffic to get to class. Just my alarm clock. One of the problems I was hung up on is parking for my car. Most campuses don't let students who dorm have cars. If they did, there was a fee or they have to take the bus to a satellite parking. But I digress.
I'm not comfortable with change. Never have. Over the years, I've learned to adapt and just go with it, for good and bad. Living alone has unprecedented freedom and independence. My younger siblings always wanted that. Understandable. My mom can be overbearing. I've learned to adapt to that as well.
I lived a pretty sheltered life at the time. I was more afraid of not making any friends if I did in-housing. My mom pushed for me to live on campus, but I declined. It saved us money. But most of all, I was uncomfortable with the unfamiliar.
Two to three years of commuting, I made a lot of friends. We would hang outside school grounds. That got to be a hassle, having to report my whereabouts to my mom (where I'm going, when I'm coming home, etc). If you lived on campus, you don't have to worry about this as much. My siblings sure as heck took advantage of it.
I always preferred to be well-grounded. Some may view that as a dull life, but not to me. I didn't really work well with people and was better company with no attachments. Right now, I can do whatever and go wherever. Currently, I'm still a contractor with continued renewals. It's not a stable job. No 401K. No vacation. No holiday pay. It's a great job that I'm really good at. When I get hired full time, I'll get all those benefits. I'll move and live closer to work. Compared to my youngest sibling's squabbles with my parents, silence never bothered me.
I'm done.
It's always hard to make a decision especially when it greatly influences your life. To some, this may seem easy to decide, but not to me. Deciding whether to live on campus or stay at home is the biggest problem right now in my life. I keep thinking of reasons to live in campus or stay at home. I keep comparing and contrasting ways how each are advantageous. This is twisting me inside. It would be great if I have advisers like the President right now. Either way, I'm still going to college. That's probably the only good thing about this, but should I stay or go?
It's hard for me to narrow down to the simplest reasons for both. If I go, I can learn to live by myself. Still, that does not guarantee me safe passage to adulthood. If I stay, it is less money to pay with tuition and dorm, but still under my parents' roof. I guess it all boils down to one thing: RULES.
With my parents, I've been told to do chores, help out, obey orders... those rules. These have turned me into the person that I am now. Without these rules I'm not me. I won't be me. I've noticed these changes ever since my parents stopped telling me to sleep at nine o'clock or telling me what to do. They still tell me occasionally to sleep early and what to do, but they don't care as much as they tell my younger sister to do them. Ever since they've mellowed down with the rules, I have more freedom. I don't remember as much, but I probably felt quite happy and excited to be able to do more things than I could have even done before. Now, I realize this much freedom is scaring me. Freedom without rules is chaos. It will regress me as a person to something else. Living in campus gives me the ultimate freedom of being by myself. I don't think I can handle that much freedom. That is why I have decided to stay home while in college.
Looking back, it wasn't really a dilemma. I was still waiting acceptance letters from the colleges I applied to. All schools were within driving distance. That said, the furthest I've driven at the time was to our local mall. If I did housing in college, I wouldn't have to worry about traffic to get to class. Just my alarm clock. One of the problems I was hung up on is parking for my car. Most campuses don't let students who dorm have cars. If they did, there was a fee or they have to take the bus to a satellite parking. But I digress.
I'm not comfortable with change. Never have. Over the years, I've learned to adapt and just go with it, for good and bad. Living alone has unprecedented freedom and independence. My younger siblings always wanted that. Understandable. My mom can be overbearing. I've learned to adapt to that as well.
I lived a pretty sheltered life at the time. I was more afraid of not making any friends if I did in-housing. My mom pushed for me to live on campus, but I declined. It saved us money. But most of all, I was uncomfortable with the unfamiliar.
Two to three years of commuting, I made a lot of friends. We would hang outside school grounds. That got to be a hassle, having to report my whereabouts to my mom (where I'm going, when I'm coming home, etc). If you lived on campus, you don't have to worry about this as much. My siblings sure as heck took advantage of it.
I always preferred to be well-grounded. Some may view that as a dull life, but not to me. I didn't really work well with people and was better company with no attachments. Right now, I can do whatever and go wherever. Currently, I'm still a contractor with continued renewals. It's not a stable job. No 401K. No vacation. No holiday pay. It's a great job that I'm really good at. When I get hired full time, I'll get all those benefits. I'll move and live closer to work. Compared to my youngest sibling's squabbles with my parents, silence never bothered me.
I'm done.
Tuesday, February 11, 2014
February Update List Post 2014
1. It's been a while. I had a few posts lined up about several games I recently played and completed. Just didn't have time to write.
2. I completed another Nanoblock set for the Great Pyramid of Giza. I recorded the video of me assembling it. I was thinking of adding the timer while editing the video, but the script is not fully compatible with my software. It shouldn't be much of a problem. I'll just need the right music to go with it.
3. I got a postcard from my friend from London. I don't get many post cards so there's that. Cool. Cool cool cool.
4. Today is my birthday. Thirty. The big 3-0. And I still got carded at the restaurant for my birthday dinner on Sunday. It was the first time I drank since August last year. Two glasses and a bottle of red wine. Dry aged steak. Lava cake. It was an expensive dinner, but my parents justified it, being my 30th birthday and all.
I'm done.
2. I completed another Nanoblock set for the Great Pyramid of Giza. I recorded the video of me assembling it. I was thinking of adding the timer while editing the video, but the script is not fully compatible with my software. It shouldn't be much of a problem. I'll just need the right music to go with it.
3. I got a postcard from my friend from London. I don't get many post cards so there's that. Cool. Cool cool cool.
4. Today is my birthday. Thirty. The big 3-0. And I still got carded at the restaurant for my birthday dinner on Sunday. It was the first time I drank since August last year. Two glasses and a bottle of red wine. Dry aged steak. Lava cake. It was an expensive dinner, but my parents justified it, being my 30th birthday and all.
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