TL;DR Movie Reviews of 2014

I haven't made a movie review at all this whole year. Here's a list and quick review of all the movies I've seen in 2014 (I probably won't see another one until next year).

1. The LEGO Movie - It's like when you see your childhood flash right before your eyes. You can't help but reminisce all the times you've played make believe and content with actual toys instead of videogames. Everything is awesome!
2. 300: Rise of an Empire - Too little. Too late. Except Eva Green. The movie probably would be 'meh' without her.
3. Journey to the West (2014) - I actually saw this at Otakon '14 in one of their video screenings. If you liked Kung Fu Hustle's comedy, this will fight right in.
4. Divergent - Based on the trilogy. It's no Twilight/Hunger Games, but it will do. It's like an edgy, dystopian Harry Potter.
5. Noah (2014) - It's based on the graphic novel that is based on the Biblical account of the flood. It was... interesting.
6. Captain America: The Winter Soldier - One of the best superhero movies to come out this year. This is also one of the best superhero stories of all time. Marvel dun good.
7. Transcendence - It's not the action-packed sci-fi movie you'd expect. It was slow-paced and almost artsy, but overall okay plot of a man who was poisoned and had his mind uploaded to a super computer to keep himself alive, in which he becomes the first A.I. of sort that could have helped humanity if it weren't for the technophobes.
8. The Amazing Spider-Man 2 - An okay movie, but the studio added some other stuff to try and compete with what Marvel is doing with the Avengers. It was a fail.
9. Million Dollar Arm - Based on a true story of this reality show made in India, a country who favors cricket over baseball, to find two pitchers for Major League team. I saw this on Korean Air on my way to the Philippines. Great movie.
10. Godzilla (2014) - The movie did not show as much of Godzilla and focused more on Heisenberg and future Scarlet Witch/Quicksilver.
11. Blended - An Adam Sandler romantic-comedy about single parents who went to an African Safari. It's classic Adam Sandler/Drew Barrymore.
12. X-Men: Days of Future Past - The movie that scrubs away the travesty that was X-Men: The Last Stand. They did right with this franchise.
13. Maleficent - A new Disney fad of recreating live-action movies of their cartoons. Angelina Jolie played Maleficent really well.
14. Edge of Tomorrow - It's so much more than just Groundhog Day with aliens. It's Groundhog Day with aliens... starring Tom Cruise and the oh-so beautiful and lovely Emily Blunt. Underrated movie.
15. 22 Jump Street - Undercover cops. This time, they're going to college. Just as funny and great as the first movie.
16. Transformers: Age of Extinction - There can't be too many Transformers. I still can't believe this is the most successful movie of 2014 (made over $1 billion worldwide).
17. Snowpiercer - I saw this on the plane to the Philippines. It's a post-apocalyptic movie where the entire world is covered in a global cooling and the only survivors are living on an endless running train where the poorest live all the way in the last train car.
18. Deliver Us from Evil - An exorcism movie based on a true story in New York.
19. Dawn of the Planet of the Apes - A sequel to Rise of the Planet of the Apes. Hail Caesar.
20. Lucy - A Luc Besson movie on what if we could unlock 100% of the brain's potential starring Scarlett Johansson
21. Little Miss Sunshine - This is an oldie, but I haven't seen it. With the exception of the brother, everyone played their character pretty well.
22. Guardians of the Galaxy - The other great superhero movie of 2014. A start of a new franchise. Also, Marvel. Can't. Fail.
23. The Equalizer - Loosely based on the tv series that my mom loved to watch when were in the Philippines in the 80s. This version is more violent and gorier. It's an avenging-type movie.
24. John Wick - A great special agent movie. The movie happens because someone killed John Wick's dog. PETA approved.
25. Kick-Ass 2 - The sequel to Kick-Ass. Part of me wanted to like it as much as first movie, but it just didn't held up. The plot for the first movie was more believable than this one.
26. Nightcrawler - Jake Gyllenhaal plays a convincing manic/wired guy who learns his ways around the nightcrawling profession: people who rush to accidents, shootings, and other aftermaths to film them and sell the footage to the highest bidding news channel. The gorier the better. He's also crazy.
27. Interstellar - I've seen this movie twice on regular theater with my parents and IMAX 70mm with my sister (her Christmas gift for me). I cried both times.
28. Big Hero 6 - A Disney CGI animated movie based on a Marvel comic book that nobody really knows about. It was a success. BayMax *glomp*
29. The Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part 1 - It's no longer about the games. It's about war propaganda and rebellion.
30. The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies - It's finally over. Very overdrawn scenes just to make it longer.
31. Into the Woods - Not your typical musical turned to movie. It starts out all happy and hopeful. Then the second act washes it all away.

I'm done.

Fez Review

Fez is a 2D puzzle game with a 3D perspective. You start out as a character named Gomez. He wakes up in his bedroom and explores the outside platformer world, talking to denizens about how everything is flat and two dimensional. Reaching the top triggers an event: a cube descends from the sky and introduces another dimension. As it turns out, this two-dimensional world is actually in the 3D realm. A few moments after that, the cube explodes into smaller cubes. It is your job to collect as much of the cube as possible to restore the balance of the world.

A screenshot midturn - You have to see the video to see what I'm talking about

Fez plays like a 2D platformer. Navigating your way around the world requires turning the entire screen 90 degrees (top down). It's all about perspective. What appears to be an unreachable platform turns out to be inches closer when turning dimensions. Separate ladders on different platforms turns to a complete ladder in a different angle. The illusion of a complete ladder is completed in 2D.

Other than these puzzle-turning events, there are codes and drawings imprinted on stones and walls. If it weren't for the huge online community following Fez, you would easily dismiss these puzzles. Ciphers, counting, etc. You need a paper and pen to solve these riddles. One particular puzzle is an obvious QR code. With your smartphone, you can scan the QR code to get the code for obtaining a cube or anti-cube piece.

The core game takes a few hours to complete. Finding all collectibles and cube pieces will take more.

I'm done.

TL;DR Movie Reviews for Winter, Spring, Summer, Some of Fall 2013

1. Hansel & Gretel - A good start for a potentially-new franchise when you cross a Grimms' fairy tale with Steampunk and dark comedy.
2. Warm Bodies - Definitely a better love story than Twilight.
3. Identity Theft - Jason Bateman in another supporting role with NOT Will Smith (ahem *Hancock*) as the lead role.
4. A Good Day to Die Hard (Die Hard 5) - It's like the "Ernie Goes To" series, except it's Bruce Willis as John McClane and he goes to Russia. Instead of hilarity ensuing, it's killing and blowing stuff up.
5. Oz: The Great and Powerful - A prequel to the Wizard of Oz with James Franco and a talking monkey.
6. The Croods - The Flinstones 3D.
7. Oblivion - Tom Cruise Promoting Scientology Part 4? 5?
8. Iron Man 3 - Marvel milk's franchise... news at 11.
9. The Great Gatsby - Leonardo DiCaprio continues being the most underrated actor ever.
10. Star Trek: Into Darkness - Benedict Cumberbatch, Klingons, Time-travelling old Spock and more lens flares.
11. Fast & Furious 6 - It's no longer about living life a quarter mile at a time. Heck, they got a tank.
12. The Hangover III - It stopped being a comedy and turned into a real kidnapping/hostage movie.
13. Now You See Me - It's like The Avengers, except with magicians... and Morgan Freeman.
14. The Internship - A great movie about Google back in 2005. A tamer version of Wedding Crashers... also in 2005.
15. Man of Steel - If Superman was done the right way with Dragonball Z fighting and the Chris Nolan/David Snyder moral-dilemma treatment.
16. This Is the End - Actually a very funny well-written comedy movie.
17. World War Z - jump-starting the shuffling/dragging vs running zombies once again.
18. Despicable Me 2 - More cuteness overload with the Minions.
19. Pacific Rim - A giant mech/robot/monster movie done well. Looks like a new franchise is born.
20. The Conjuring - You will shit your pants and have the hair on your arms standing up.
21. The Wolverine - If Wolverine was given the Christopher Nolan down-to-earth treatment and lost his powers. That's how boring this movie was. The only saving grace is the teaser for next year's X-Men movie, uniting the cast of First Class and who would come back from The Last Stand.
22. Elysium - from the director that brought you District 9. Stars MAAAAATT DAAAAAMON!!! And Jodie Foster.
23. Jobs - Ashton Kutcher has portrayed Steve Jobs pretty well. Could have used slightly better writing, though.
24. Instructions not INCLUDED - Tear jerker of a comedy drama.
25. Insidious 2 - Bigger budget and scarier than the first.
26. Gravity - Who would have thought that two people floating in space would be so intense and thought provoking?

I'm done.